diff --git a/src/api/routes/beaker.ts b/src/api/routes/beaker.ts
new file mode 100644
index 00000000..200d6a33
--- /dev/null
+++ b/src/api/routes/beaker.ts
@@ -0,0 +1,38 @@
+/*
+	Spacebar: A FOSS re-implementation and extension of the Discord.com backend.
+	Copyright (C) 2025 Spacebar and Spacebar Contributors
+	
+	This program is free software: you can redistribute it and/or modify
+	it under the terms of the GNU Affero General Public License as published
+	by the Free Software Foundation, either version 3 of the License, or
+	(at your option) any later version.
+	
+	This program is distributed in the hope that it will be useful,
+	but WITHOUT ANY WARRANTY; without even the implied warranty of
+	MERCHANTABILITY or FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE.  See the
+	GNU Affero General Public License for more details.
+	
+	You should have received a copy of the GNU Affero General Public License
+	along with this program.  If not, see <https://www.gnu.org/licenses/>.
+*/
+
+import { route } from "@spacebar/api";
+import { Request, Response, Router } from "express";
+
+const router = Router();
+
+// screw off, telemetry requests
+router.post(
+	"/",
+	route({
+		responses: {
+			204: {},
+		},
+	}),
+	(req: Request, res: Response) => {
+		// TODO:
+		res.sendStatus(204);
+	},
+);
+
+export default router;